Oh hey there. We are still getting married. I just haven’t had much time to blog about it. Well, if I’m being honest, I had a mild freakout and wasn’t sure if I wanted to do the whole thing at all. Wasn’t feeling too into blogging that whole situation.
Some days I’m still not sure how this whole thing jives with my feminism, but I love my partner, and he loves me, and it all feels right more than it feels wrong. So we’re getting married on July 11th!
We are pretty far along in the process of planning a wedding, and I’ve picked up a few little things on the way that I thought I would share to help you on your big fat feminist wedding journey.
Here’s five things you can do to make your wedding more feminist-friendly:
Hire Vendors in Communities You Support
You need a florist, caterer, photographer, wedding planner, etc., etc. Make it a point to hire a woman! Perhaps a woman of color or a trans* person. Make sure your money goes to the right folks. White cis dudes don’t need anymore money.
Our photographers are a male and female duo. Our caterer is a non-black woman of color. And that’s just two of the professionals we’ve hired so far. Use this chance to support our sisters in business!
Rent A Non-Profit Venue
Checkout local non-profits in your area. Do they have a building you can use in their off hours? Your venue deposit will go toward a great cause, and as a bonus they usually don’t have catering and liquor restrictions like other venues, which translates into less expense.
We opted to use the SLC Arts Hub!
Use Feminist Literature in Your Ceremony Readings
Chances are you’re not opting for traditional vows (none of that “to honor and obey” stuff here). Well, why don’t you comb through feminist poetry to include some feminist literature in your ceremony? Perhaps a little bell hooks or Adrienne Rich to help express your love.
Opt for Environmentally Friendly Options
The way we treat the Earth is a feminist issue. Are you going to send out save the dates and invites? Take your guest list and double it. Now think of that in terms of planes, trains, and automobiles. Is it really worth it to drive those invites all around town? We opted for Greenvelope. The company is committed to environmentally friendly practices, and they take it a step further with their giving: “To express our commitment towards this goal, we donate a percentage of every sale to Mountains to Sound, a non-profit organization that maintains forests.” You get to save on carbon emissions, donate to charity, and it’s wayyyyy cheaper than traditional invites.
This one is really simple, but think about where your flowers come from. Do you really need flowers from South America? Again, think in terms of carbon emissions. Opt for some local flowers, or forego them entirely. We’re having a flower-free wedding!
Opt for Inclusive Food Choices
Chances are you have some friends who are Muslim or Jewish–do you have halal or kosher food? What about your vegan, vegetarian, and gluten-free friends? Don’t get me wrong: It’s your day, and things can get pricey if you try to accommodate everyone, but at least let your friends know ahead of time if there isn’t a food option for them, and don’t be offended if they opt not to attend.
These are just a few of the things we are doing on our journey. Next week I’ll share with you the sexist traditions we’ve abandoned, and a few that have managed to sneak in.